Well i survived, after a week away from home for personal reasons i am back and i will be the first to admit i am glad. It seems that in less than a year this is now home to me, its where i want to be in my life and for good or bad the week apart from Master has had its good points and its bad.
I am in a way glad for the separation, it has helped bring us to a place where we need to be, all to often things go 'stale' and a slave gets taken for granted, if they are always there then how can a Master really appreciate all that they do for them ? The same goes for a Master, if He is constantly looking out for His property then how can she know what to do when He is not there ?
There has been a lot going on in our lives this past month and that has added to stress on both parties, hell my face tells its own tale with my eyes being nearly swollen shut with stress related sties and its been painful to say the least. There comes a time when you need to step away, take a backward step to figure out where the hell you are going and the reasons why, i know i have hadmore than a few of those moment this past month and no matter how much Master says it will all be ok and things will be fine i could not see the wood for the trees surrounding me and that scared me, would it be ok ? would things be better than they have been this past few months ? is this really what Master wants or needs in His life ? So many questions and me without an answer to any of them, just having to cope as best i can and pray things work out so He is happy and if they do then at what cost to me and my happiness ?
Sometimes stepping back is the only option and sometimes it seems there is no way forward but with faith and trust in your Master you carry on and pray that things are this way now for the eventual better outcome, are things different now ? have they improved ? will there be happiness for all involved ? i don't really know at the moment all i can do is wait and hope
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